As you should. You brought up your mom. I loved how open you were in your memoir because it was so raw and honest, but also hopeful. How did that experience change you, namely the press tour where you were asked to talk about it all of the time?
Well, I feel like if you’re going to write a memoir, people need to share stories. You might as well go deep. Otherwise, what’s the point? I didn’t want to do some surfacing, “Hey, girls, let’s talk about….” Because I went deep, so many people reached out to me with personal stories, telling me about their own fathers.
It was interesting because somebody on my team had said, “The press tour is going to be exhausting. You’re going to be talking about this emotional stuff. You’re going to get so tired.” I never felt tired. I feel like it’s much harder to have to go and be on and tell little comedy anecdotes. I found that harder. This was more me. I felt that the conversations were almost like group therapy. It’s scary, yes, because you’re afraid you’re going to be judged, but I really enjoyed the process. It was really cathartic.
I will say, my one regret was years ago when I got nominated for an Emmy Award. I took my husband, who was my boyfriend then, instead of my dad. My husband ended up being able to come to tons of awards later, but I wish I would’ve brought my dad because he was the one. He was like my mom, a gypsy rose. He really was so involved in my career. I was very close to my dad, which actually made the grieving easier when he passed because we were so close. There was no stone unturned. Does that make sense?
Yes. My mom was in a terrible car accident when I was 13 and was in the hospital for a few weeks. The doctors were concerned about long-term brain damage, and she had to relearn so many basics. Even though she recovered, it fundamentally changed me. It’s why I value my time with my parents as much as I do. I’ve seen very quickly how fast that can go away.
Oh, my God. See, isn’t that interesting? You were 13. It’s actually very similar to my story. When you go through something like that where you realize life is so precious, it changes your whole perspective, doesn’t it?
Kids at the time were like, “I just want to party, I want to go out.” I had no interest in any of that. I just wanted to be with my parents. You feel like you’re in a different world compared with everyone else because you’ve been through something so life-changing.
To me, family is always number one. You would never have to explain that to me. Put it that way. It is what I was saying before—there’s healthy guilt and toxic guilt.
Before we wrap up, this is such a 180, but you are good friends with Mike White, who created our national obsession with The White Lotus. You played Jake Lacy’s mom, Kitty, in season one. Would you come back and revisit her in another season? I feel like she’s the type that visits all the White Lotus resorts.